A More Serious Question About Game Development

So I’ve been thinking this over for some time now, and I’m just not sure about this anymore.

I have ideas for games but for a fetish game I only really have one, and I feel it’s not that good unless I add something else to make it more of a game. Then when I add something to make it more game like I start making a game that’s no longer about sexual attraction or one that turns me off given what was added to make it a game.

Then there’s the fetish itself. I’m still turned on by fat and weight gain, so making a fetish game seems like a good idea. Though I have other issues, there are certain fetishes that either disturb me or trigger my PTSD, and while I obviously wont be putting them in the game, art is something that once you make it and release it to others they will do whatever they want with it and there’s nothing you can do about it.

I’d rather not have the character I made to be everything I’m turned on by start being used in places where I’d rather not have her be in. Though I’m not able to stop people from doing that. Though this isn’t my only issue, I also am afraid that due to my triggers I’m partially unable to work on this due to the fact I’ll need to ask for help, and previous encounters doing so on the Discord server has led to terrible results.

I’ve had people come into my DMs, after I let it slip that I had been through something terrible, and come to tell me that what happened to me was “perfectly normal and acceptable” and “no one cares” and also that I “deserved it”. Then when also asking for help in other areas I’ve had people tell me inaccurate information when they were supposed to be the expert, they even bragged on how much they were the expert by saying how easy it was for them to do what I’m trying to do, but not telling me, a complete novice, how to do it as a complete novice.

Also, due to my PTSD nothing is easy for me to do anymore. I have to go through while trying to push things out of my head because of it. I can’t easily do things that are easy for others anymore because of what happened. Asking for help is also a hard enough process without being treated like I “should already know this” when I clearly do not and can barely function as human being anymore without having to be reminded of horrible things I’d rather forget.

As for keeping my character out of harms way, I think I can do that by making her an OC and that whenever someone uses her, I have more control, but I’m not really sure if that will solve my issue. Though for keeping me out of harms way, there is only one answer, give up.

Instead of asking for help I should just what skills I have to make a game, or rather something that’s more an interactive text adventure (words and links), and possibly never release it, and if I do somehow make it forgettable so no one will do thing to it. Or the even safer option, not make it at all and focus on games that aren’t fat fetish ones.

Which is my problem, I do want to make one, but I fear the potential issues of making one and the fact that I will be unable to certain things that I feel is needed for the game (art and animation, gameplay elements like battles or puzzles), so I’d need help but I can’t ask or else I’ll end up in the same problems above, and then there’s releasing it and having to face the problems from that.

I want to make a more cinematic game, a masterpiece even, but I’m not sure I can really do that in a fat fetish concept, not because it can’t be done, but because I can’t do it without getting hurt in one way or another. Which makes me think I should just focus on a “normal” game which wont invite people to make horrible things happen to the characters, or if they do I can avoid them by not looking for any NSFW art from my game whatsoever, and block people who send it my way. Though that won’t stop them either, and I’m not sure what to do.

What should I do? I’m afraid to ask you for what I said above, but also I have no one else to ask. Maybe I’ll regret this, maybe I wont, either way answers are appreciated, even if I think they’ll be heavily one sided to be “so what if it hurts you, give us what we want”. I don’t know what you want anymore.

Looking over your post it seems your largest barrier is your PTSD. The best way to fight that would be with professional help. There is no shame is seeking help from a professional, especially if it is as debilitating at you say it is.

I do understand you may already be seeking or receiving professional help but there is not much more I can suggest.


While seeking help is wise, my PTSD is not my largest barrier it’s how other people treat my PTSD as being nothing to worry about or something to try and push to the brink and see what I’ll do.

Its telling people I have a problem and them then reacting with “how can I make it worse”. I’m afraid that making a game will only invite more people to do this instead of them understanding it and letting me be.

That is why I’m asking if I should bother making a game at all or can I force them to leave me be in some way (put take down notices on rule 34 art that is made to trigger me, or block people from all platforms who will hurt me)? My question is will I fully be able to mentally cope with making a game or is my paranoia making a huge deal out of a problem that doesn’t exist?

I’ll further simplify the question: Should I leave this place, this site and the discord server to protect myself, or should I try to stay despite what pain it may cause me?

Can I really be able to avoid pain from other users here, or am I doomed to suffer?

It’s too late for me to form a good response for you and I am a bit afraid this may get a bit out of control while I am asleep so I am going to lock this thread till I can give you a better response tomorrow.


Ok, sorry it took me so long to get back to this. Its been a hectic day for the most part.

So to be blunt, if you feel being here harms your mental health and you feel it is best for you to leave then you should do what is best for you.

That being said the fact of the matter is developing a game requires trust. That may be trust in your team if you are working with others or trust in those playing your game. Either way, while you claim your PTSD is not your largest barrier it obviously is as your fear of how people will react to it or it getting triggered by someone (accidentally or otherwise) seems to keep you from trusting people.

And while this has been told to you already by our staff, if you feel someone is harassing you in our community do not hesitate to notify us by DM or private message so we can investigate it. We do take harassment of users very seriously and if we find evidence of the claimed harassment we will take proper steps to attempt to end it.

So to summarize here is my advise

  1. Do what is best for you even if that means leaving. You must prioritize your mental health first.

  2. Seek professional help. While I know for sure there is one or two people in the community that are certified psychiatrist/psychologists our staff are not and that should not be assumed for the standard user. Only a professional can provide the necessary assistance effectively.

  3. If you are being harassed report it to our staff. We can not do anything about it if we do not know about it.

I do hope this will help you. As a side note I will be keeping this thread locked as this is not really a good place to discuss these topics.