Polls For The Soul, and How Our Fetishes Influence Us

General Discussion
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Hello.

I’ve been thinking of what to post here in this section of the forum, with my thoughts being on some demographics, and from what I’ve seen this community enjoys a good poll every once and a while.

Something that’s interested me as I’ve learned I’m apart of a deviant sect of sexuality is what causes it, or at least some things that coincide with it. (Maybe I should minor in sociology if I end up going to college.)

A really good post that I really wanted to say something in but had nothing unique to say was this post:

It was/is less trying to find a definitive answer and more just giving people a platform to express their experiences. There will likely be no way to know until we have a Theory of The Mind, or something to that extent, but I wanted to see if polling could find some correlations, and also maybe see about/correct any stereotypes I’ve seen from people who don’t have the same thoughts as us.

Some of these are simplifications of previous polls I’ve seen, but most are unique ideas. All polls I’ve found will also be linked at the bottom of this post, and if you’ve found/made more on the forum, send a post in here so that I can link it. Also, it goes without saying that I searched pretty good, so if some of these questions are just blatant repeats I’m sorry.

Your Bodytype
Being a chunky monkey myself, I wondered how that may have influenced my sexuality.

I specified “obese” because 60% of people in The US are overweight already.

(Makes me think why people are freaking out that overweight chicks are showing up on fashion magazines now, given over half the people they look at on a day to day basis look like that, but ain’t that America?)

Your Bodytype
  • Thin
  • Average
  • Athletic
  • Obese
0 voters

Stance on Gaining Weight (In Real Life)
Ambivalent would mean you would do it if someone in your life you cared about wanted you to do it, but otherwise it could be one way or the other.

Stance on Gaining Weight (In Real Life)
  • Oppose
  • Ambivalent
  • Approve
0 voters

Stance on Your Partner Gaining Weight (In Real Life)?
Ambivalent means you wouldn’t specifically try to influence your partner’s choices one way or the other.

You cannot edit polls after the first 5 minutes of posting, so, for the record: if you do not have a partner yet, but plan to maybe get one one day, then this still applies to you, only theoretically for you.

Stance on Your Partner Gaining Weight (In Real Life)?
  • Oppose
  • Ambivalent
  • Approve
  • N/A (ARO GANG RISE UP)
0 voters

Does Anyone In Real Life Know Your Fetish?
I myself am a pretty open book, though I know some aren’t so lucky.

Does Anyone In Real Life Know Your Fetish?
  • Nobody
  • Only Those Closest
  • I’m An Open Book
0 voters

Any Other Specific Fetishes?
Things like being an ass man don’t count. Also, “Fat Agacent” to me is stuff that you like for very similar reasons as weight gain. Expansion for example to me is almost identical in the itch it scratches.

I would consider if anthro characters specifically are something you like over anything else I’d consider that to be different, but if you just think Bugs Bunny would look fine with some cushion for the pushing then I would just consider that fat adjacent. (Big Chungus got me actin’ unwise…)

Any Other Specific Fetishes?
  • None That Aren’t Fat Adjacent
  • Very Few
  • Many
0 voters

Do You Find Yourself More Endeered To Fat People?
I can’t help sometimes but root for the thiccums in most of any situation. I was curious if anyone else thought the same way.

Also, answering “no” just means you wouldn’t be specifically MORE endeered to a fat person over anyone else.

Do You Find Yourself More Endeered To Fat People?
  • No
  • Yes
0 voters

Do You Consider Yourself To Be Creative?
For a site that’s partially dedicated to creating things I found this to be an important question. Please be honest though.

Do You Consider Yourself To Be Creative?
  • No
  • A Little
  • Yes
0 voters

What Genre Would You Consider To Be Your Favorite?
I have seen A LOT of high fantasy stuff around here, which isn’t a bad thing, I was just curious if that was because of some kind of demand, or just because it’s one of the most popular genres of games in general.

“Contemporary Fiction” is just any story set in our world that doesn’t necessarily have fantasy elements like Urban Fantasy. Think maybe Alternate History, Quentin Tarantino movies, that sort of stuff.

What Genre Would You Consider To Be Your Favorite?
  • High/Low Fantasy
  • Sci-Fi
  • Urban Fantasy/Contemporary Fiction
  • Any of the ___punks
  • Horror/Mystery
  • Apocalyptic/Western
  • None of These (Explain Below)
0 voters

Polls about sexuality, romance, roleplay and general fetish preferences:

A poll just about asexuality:

A poll just about vore:

A poll about about unwilling weight gain (in fiction):

A poll about where in general people in this community are located (I WAS BORN IN THE USA :us:):

A poll about furries:

A conversation about employment:

Polls about bodytype preferences:

This isn’t just a poll however. Are there any things you’ve seen that you either think influenced your fetish, or things that you would say that your fetish actually influenced you on.

From the polls listed, I’ve gathered a couple of things:

  1. A good amount here are asexual (though obviously not all it is just much more than on average.) The same is also true with LGBT people in general (happy pride month btw).
  2. A grand majority are cis men.
  3. A lot are from The Western World, though this is likely mostly influenced by the forum being in English.
  4. More than normal are furries/at least ambivalent to anthro characters.
  5. Most prefer unwilling weight gain over willing, which was one of the only results that actually surprised me for some reason.
  6. Most (as of 2020) are employed in the tech industry, standard service jobs, or curiously are engineers of some stripe.

Do you have any more unique observations? Let me know!

Edit 1: Refined the wording a little bit. Thank you @Anonymous264170, @RussianInternet, and @Tombot for your input in that regard.
Edit 2. Added At it again with a poll tier of favorite body types. and proper dividers.

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Thanks for mentioning my post! I had no idea it would’ve been THAT popular despite it having been 3 years since I’ve made that post

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Good post! Not only for your own poll but for the collection of polls in general, making this a polling hub of sorts. Always useful to have a centralised repository of data.

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Oh yeah, you know it!

I’m gonna be updating it as things come to my attention. Ultimately you gotta take data like this with a grain of salt given even over 100 answers is still a very small sample size, and even though I intentionally left out some more controversial/hard hitting questions, some people still might be intentionally/unintentionally dishonest.

Though that doesn’t really matter too much because I mostly care about what people are saying themselves. I also just wanted to ask some unorthodox questions I didn’t really see anyone else talking about. Specifically people’s bodytype, and their propensity to be more endeered to fat people in real life, as those have been two things I’ve wondered.

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I really hope the names of people who voted on this poll never come out because that would cause ALL sorts of shit. like wow.

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To clarify my position on the “are you more endeered to fat people”, I would say that in fiction I tend to root for/enthuse over plus-sized female characters in the rare times they’re portrayed. In real life, I don’t really discriminate one way or another, I’m equally cordial to anyone regardless of size. Though, I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy having large women nearby xD

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I mean, honestly, most of the shit someone’d get is just having this fetish, honestly. A lot of these questions are things that people would automatically have thoughts about somebody about. Though if you want to clarify what you mean that would actually be within the purview of this post, with “how your fetish influences you” and whatnot.

Though, if you are actually worried it appears as if the pie graph doesn’t actually reveal the accounts of who voted like the bar graph does, so no worries all around.

…unless you’re talking about all the people who voted on the genre poll. That’s clearly the most controversial thing here, and I will find you if you voted for High Fantasy!

(This isn’t an actual threat I like high fantasy too.)

I meant for both. If someone’s got any sort of biases that way not specifically motivated by hOrNy and just your choices when blindfolded for any other traits about a person I would recommend they check “Yes”. Though now I’m curious what would’ve happened if I added an option that said: “Only in fiction.”

Another interesting thing: When I left it was firmly in the “Yes” camp for being more endeered to fat people, but now as more votes have came in it slowly shifted to the “No” camp. Could this be influenced by timezones? Could the rest of the world, despite what they say about making fun of us 'Muricans :us: being fat, are endeered to us for that very quality??

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True, but obese is a separate BMI category. I don’t think I am there yet(?), but I am definitely going down that road. Over the past six months, I have started to self-identify closer to “obese” than “average.”

Damn, you hit the sensitive targets. (It’s cool, though.) I don’t like being overweight, and do not wish to gain more. On the other hand, I don’t hate my figure enough to make a dramatic lifestyle change to lose weight. I sided with “oppose,” but it’s with limits on the willpower.

I assume you mean outside of this community. Uhhhh, I don’t think so? I hope not? They might have an inkling if they catch me staring, but I haven’t shared it with anyone face-to-face. “Nobody” (with fingers crossed).

I consider pregnancy to be a form of expansion, but in my case, I wouldn’t call it “fat adjacent” because the source of weight gain is different and there is a visual distinction. However, while I will not follow you out on that metaphorical limb, I think you are right in at least some, if not most, cases.

I have no idea what “high/low fantasy” means.

Overall, I second @AlexKay–this is useful and well thought out. I think I posted a topic asking people what their profession was, but you would have had to look deep in the dustbin to find that one.

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I think I completely botched answering this question: “Stance on Your Partner Gaining Weight (In Real Life)?”

Both the question and the answers seems to infer that everyone reading it either has a partner or else is completely Aesexual, which is extremely unrealistic. I only answered the way I did because I assume this just meant “non applicable”.

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I think the poll’s entirely hypothetical anyway. Asexuals are implied to never have a partner, so that’s why it’s N/A. I don’t know if that’s true, but I assume that’s why it’s in the poll that way

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That was my intention. The intention was something more than overweight because if I hadn’t done that then most people if they were answering honestly would’ve picked “overweight”, and I wanted to skew the results towards putting people in boxes that better describe them, given “overweight” is actually mostly (very big quotation marks here) “average”.

I did not mean to offend at all, and if I did I apologize. I myself like I said am very much overweight, but trying to get better myself.

I just in general wanted to get people’s opinions on it because I kind of knew where the thing about your partners gaining weight would go, and I figured it would be fair to not only see what people thought about their partner, but also about what they thought of themselves.

It’s sad not a whole lot of people are in my situation. I just can’t keep secrets for the life of me. I always worry about what will happen if it gets revealed, and I just in general don’t like to lie in any way. I understand completely why someone wouldn’t wanna do that however. It’s personally caused me a bit of grief with people not really fully understanding, but ultimately I enjoy not feeling like I’m hiding anything from anyone.

I was just giving examples. My opinion on pregnancy particularly for the purposes of this poll is that it can depend. The thing is that some people like it for completely different reasons, and what I was meaning by “Fat Adjacent” is if you like it for similar reasons you like fat stuff then I would consider it “Fat Adjacent”. The reason why I brought up the example of it looking similar is I thought that might be a better way to explain it, but I might edit it postumously in a few minutes here when I get done replying. For example some people like Vore because of the pred/prey dynamic, bot for me personally I don’t like it for that. That’s just one example though.

High Fantasy is like, witches, dragons, warlocks, spells. Think Lord of The Rings, The Elder Scrolls, and all that. Some people expand it out further to mean basically any extremely fantastical story, but it’s stereotypically very close to Tolkienesque stories.

Low Fantasy is like a fictional medieval world where there’s less fantastical stuff. Think like Kingdom Come: Deliverance, or basically any story set in a fictional medieval world that magic and fictional races and all that aren’t that prevalent.

I put Low Fantasy in there because I wanted to simplify the genre picks as much as possible. I could’ve made a multi-choice poll but I genuinely just wanted to get a sense of what someone’s favorite was, you know? That’s why I lumped similar genres in with one another. Like Horror and Mystery for example, because they scratch very similar itches for people in my opinion, just like how High and Low Fantasy are similar save for the lack of super duper fantastical elements like elves, magic spells, and all that.

I’m very very glad you think that way too! Sorry for any unintentional discomfort I might’ve given you. That wasn’t my intention. However you want to give me the profession poll, I will put it in here with the rest.

I actually ended up finding it myself! I will put it on this post in a moment.

I did not mean to imply that if you don’t have a partner that means you’re aromantic. Like I said in my responses to @Anonymous264170, I’m going to probably go back and change the wording a little bit for some polls. I apologize for that. What I meant was any partner you theoretically would, or already have. N/A was specifically if you never even plan to have a partner in the future. IE: If you’re aromantic. Hence why it originally read: N/A (ARO GANG RISE UP!)

Also, the term you’re both looking for is aromantic. Asexuals like myself are completely capable of having romantic relationships, the sexual part of the relationship is what we do not really have interest in. It is the other way around for aromantic people. Aromanticism from what I understand is actually pretty common with asexuality, but it’s not mutually exclusive one way or the other. It is a very broad spectrum both ways.

Thank you both for educating me inadvertently about using more common language in these. I try my best sometimes but it doesn’t always end up that way.

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Thanks for the poll mention :smile:

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TL;DR: @The_Stranger has really sound reasoning, and someone needs to perform an autopsy on my brain to figure out what’s wrong with me (spoiler alert: I am an idealist).

Genius!

No offense taken. Seems like we are in a similar boat. I find that it makes for an odd reckoning: I am attracted to obese physiques, but I am unhappy essentially living my own unwilling weight gain fantasy. Add on top of that the wrinkle that my attraction to it is asexual, and you end up with a twisted fetish that makes practically no sense whatsoever. I guess the only way to rationalize it is that gaining weight and experiencing the consequences of it firsthand is not as fun as my visions of it, even though my attraction to this fetish comes largely from the not-fun, realistic aspects.

Good for you. This opens up another can of mixed thoughts. As an asexual, I don’t really care to share with anyone outside of the fetish community what my attractions are. The kink is for self-pleasure only, so sharing it would not do any good. Does keeping it under wraps cause me worry? Occasionally, but I am comfortable with the tradeoff. Everyone should hopefully be making the decision that is going to give them the most peace.

Good to know. Thank you. I would have just called the genre “Medieval,” but you know a lot more about the genre than I do.

(I’m proud of myself for figuring out what “Aro” stood for without looking it up.) I find “aromantic” to be a peculiar term. The common definition is what you listed–a lack of interest in having a romantic partner. In that sense, I am aromantic. However, my style of fiction writing is quite romantic, and I love me a good wholesome romance (as long as the cheesiness is not too cliché). (Edit: I figured it out–I’m just an aromantic sap.)

But yeah, your thoughtful posts are thought-provoking, and I thrive on these kinds of intellectual, self-reflective conversations. For me, this thread really does contain “polls for the soul.” Thanks again!

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Don’t talk about yourself that way. Your insights were very good.

It does make sense. Something I think being asexual helps ace people realize is that sexuality isn’t an on and off switch, and it isn’t just as simple as liking boys, liking girls, liking both, or neither. It’s not only completely different for every person, but it is also constantly (if maybe slowly) in flux in some ways. Some like receiving, some like giving, some like both. Some people just like to watch, or fantasize. Some people might like superficial things about it but the more realistic it is the more they aren’t partial to it. Nothing is off the table. So it’s entirely possible with all of these variables that some would end up much like you and me.

Truth is, (and this actually goes for a lot of things) labels are helpful for some things, but tell you very little about the intricate details of whatever is being labeled. An asexual could be someone who never has any fantasies or libido, or they could have fetishes like you or I. Just because you give yourself the label “fat fetishist” doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what it means to you. Every single one of you reading this right now is unique. You aren’t just a sum of 21 questions on a personality quiz. You are a sextillion times more complex than any character written on any page of any book. Scratch that. You are a sextillion times more complex than every single character of every single story ever told. No matter how much time their author could sit there writing, they couldn’t write long enough to sequence your genome. I couldn’t tell you 1 percent of what makes you unique in my entire lifetime if I just sat here typing forever. Remember this if anyone tries to fool you for one millisecond into thinking you’re anything less than absolutely amazing.

It isn’t “twisted”. It’s just complex, because your mind is complex. More complex than any little label could define it as. We like the same thing, for example, but the reasons why could be completely different. The physical equivalent of spaghetti wires you don’t know which is which because of the pure complexity.

…

That being said labels are still fun. :stuck_out_tongue:

I guess I characterized it the wrong way then. I just projected a bit I guess. For me, honesty about myself is one of the ways I keep my self esteem up. If I wasn’t willing to tell somebody something about me, to me it sort of feels like I don’t like it as much as I do the other parts of me.

I was in a discussion with one of my friends about it, and he said: “Why do you NEED to talk about it?”, and I said: “Because it’s me. It’s as much me as any other part.”

Part of me going on this forum was about showing like-minded people that part of me, but that doesn’t mean I won’t still be open about it.

The other reason I do it is because it’s one of those things people can “dig up”. Like, remember the So Sorry dude? If people don’t then I’ll briefly summarize:

They gave Toby Fox enough money on his Undertale Kickstarter to get their “fan troll” in the game. The character they put into Undertale was a heavily edited version of their 'sona that happens to engages in our very fetish. People dug this up and then absolutely annihilated the dude. Reduced to quarks. Even after Toby told them to stop I still hear the So Sorry dude at the butt of jokes.

For me I don’t wanna have anything somebody could “dig up” on me. I’m anxiety ridden enough as it is. If Quentin Tarantino can rock a foot fetish I can do this too, lol.

Some people do. The problem is that universes like The Elder Scrolls blur the line on what is considered “Medieval”. Like, Hammerfell had gunpowder in the late second era, and navies are powerful enough to establish small colonies on far away islands and mysterious new continents. That isn’t very medieval.

I’m right there with you. It goes back to what I was talking about before. It’s all a spectrum. There are some people who don’t even understand romance, and then there are ones like us. Though, I’m personally demiromantic myself.

Right back atcha. Honestly I didn’t forsee there being so many ace people here. Becoming active in this community was like killing two birds with one stone for me.

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I can’t vote on “Do You Find Yourself More Endeered To Fat People?”, because I can’t understand the meaning of “endeered” word here. Google translate don’t make it clear for me too. The author wants to know if I show any special respect for a person if she is fat? Well, of course, if I see a beautiful fat girl, then I will be more supportive of helping her than a thin girl, but I don’t think this is what author wanted to know.

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It is rare for me to find someone on this forum that writes longer posts than I do. I will try to keep this one shorter so that I don’t hog up the conversation space. Forum topics are like massive tables–anyone can pull up a chair, but if you see the host (i.e., you) primarily having a side conversation with one guest (i.e., me), the hot air that they (we) let off can consume all the oxygen in the room. I mean all of this with some facetiousness, of course, but it still would be better to let others get to steer the chat.

This sparked the lightbulb moment for me. My preferences are still nuanced and complex, but I am getting closer to finding the words to describe it. For now, I would identify myself as a sexually repulsed voyeur. I love to roleplay as the beings I am attracted to, but viewing sexual acts is a turn-off for me. So as a “PG-13” voyeur, I get less satisfaction out of becoming the object of my own attraction (i.e., becoming the gainer). In short, my asexuality curtails my level of voyeurism, and my voyeurism limits my ideal level of embodiment within the fetish.

I like this perspective. For me, I take solace in the fact that most people have secrets, or at least a private life. I don’t view it as us repressing that aspect of our respective lives–it’s just being selective as to who we share it with (a need-to-know basis). For example, my friend has different circles of friends, forged over various interests. He doesn’t share a ton of his Indian culture interests with me because I would not be able to relate to them and care about them with the same enthusiasm that he has. We all compartmentalize our lives to some extent; even “open books” do.

The matter of the private life being “dug up” is an interesting one, since I find that the risk is tied to your level of fame and what is being “dug up.” The former dictates how many people will see the unearthed secrets, while the latter controls the potential for repercussions. I don’t care to be famous in public life (notice that I did not say “real life,” because that implies that my private life is not real), so hardly anyone would see the cat being released out of the bag.

As for what is being “dug up,” it’s embarrassing, but I can own it because it is not criminal. My mother discovered my pregnancy fetish when I was in high school, I think. She broached the subject with me cautiously, but aside from a slight blush, I just accepted it without major affect. “Yeah, I’m into that stuff. I don’t fully know why, but I am.” Even if someone more adversarial to you uncovers your private life, they will only hold it over your head if you show that it bothers you. If you shrug it off, there is little gain in spreading the news. Your private life is one of billions, and most people are too consumed with containing their own to care a ton about yours.

Aaand so much for keeping this brief. Let me gloss over the rest of your reply by saying “I agree” to everything. If we get too off track, we can move this to a DM.

P.S.

Based on this discussion, I think you would do well in sociology, psychology, or philosophy. You have the curiosity and empathy to really sink your teeth into those subjects. I took a number of those classes in college, but I majored in political science, so maybe I just like to argue more?

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Agreed. Really good conversation though!

Coldsteel! Love your work, man!

This was the right interpretation.

I actually realized just now I spelled it wrong. It’s “endeared”, not endeered. I can’t change polls 5 minutes after they’re created so I’m just going to pretend it’s a furry pun.

To answer it in the most simple terms possible so that it’s easier for you: “You were correct.”

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Oh, now goodle translate make it clear for me. Thanks :slight_smile:
But, there is still one problem in this question: it ask about all fat people when I more endeared only to female which I find attractive. Maybe that is why many people voted as “no”.

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I’m surprised and flattered that the poll I made was worthy of this much consideration, especially since there are things that, in hindsight, I wish I had done differently when making it.

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This set of questions gave me a lot of introspection. Specifically, the first 4 questions. I suppose fetishes have many ways of manifesting themselves in people’s lives; there’s people out there who engage in exhibitionism, for instance. I certainly have a keen interest in fat, but no one around me would ever be sble to tell.

My lifestyle and values are greatly at odds with this fetish. I exercise 5 days a week with a good mix of heavy lifting and cardio, I advocate for fitness and good eating habits, and I generally oppose purposefully getting fat (though I won’t go telling strangers how to live their life). I always assist close friends and family when they ask for fitness help or advice, and sometimes, I’m guilty of giving that advice when unasked :sweat_smile: I suppose it’s the same concept of a BDSM enthusiast accidentally slamming their hand in a car door; without the proper context, it’s just painful.

In short, I think this poll made me realize my context for this fetish shrunk drastically as the years went by. Still there, just not so…prevalent?

Great post.

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